Thursday, 26 April 2012

What's Love Got To Do With It?!!


So one of our intrepid members on Facebook (big ups Elon) mentioned during one of our discussions that ‘is sex the goal of a relationship’?

Good question.

Like all discussions about sex and relationship, at one point the question becomes what has sex got to do with a good relationship but also what has love got to do with good sex?

On an average day millions of men and women are getting it on, not for love, but for the pleasure and satisfaction, and they are not thinking about love or emotional connectedness, they are focused on pure pleasure, so is this sort of sex wrong? Also when a couple have angry sex and claim it’s the best sex ever; does this make their relationship shoddier?

The truth is sex had in love does have a different, deeper flavor to that had in the heat of want,  I know this to some people is sacrilegious after all most people’s best sex has not been with people that they love. In fact most of the sex they have had in love has been boring and pedestrian. Like most things sex had the same way at the same time with the same emotional, physical and mental baggage will be boring, you have to shake things up!  What sex in love gives you (or should give you) is a feeling of trust, acceptance and the willingness to experiment.  The truth is more often than not for a lot of couples, it brings negotiation, accusations and obligation.

On the flip side sex without love has its own thrills, from the experimentation with a new partner to the surprise of what might be discovered, sex without love is what often makes both men and women revel in the unknown.

The problem with both types of sex is that people often forget that neither fulfils what an individual is looking for it they themselves don’t know.  Many people use sex as a substitute for comfort, affection or acknowledgment and often find themselves on the other side of good sex which is; pity sex, sad sex, or worst of all disappointed sex.

So if anybody asks you what ‘love has to do with it?’ tell them nothing but it doesn’t hurt any!

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