The Rules to a Just Sex Relationship

The Just Sex Relationship, Booty Call, Friends with Benefits, regardless of what you call this sex only relationship that satisfies your horny self, and can scratch the itch of days, weeks, months or years. It is important to note that this sort of relationship can be a dangerous emotional quagmire.

Don’t get me wrong, if the itch is there and you have somebody who can supply you with the balm, (no judging) go for it, we all have our needs. But what happens when what is meant to be a random call when the urge is on you, or the between relationship ‘my friend’ call now exceeds the prerequisite time limit.

When suddenly you have a rat in your house you call, or your car has broken down, you call, or you want to have a buffer between that crazy girl and you, you call. What happens when what should be a slash and dash, now has one party wanting acknowledgement. Well as the bard says (ok Shakespeare did not say what I’m about to say) you just moved into the bitch part of a Just Sex Relationship.

To being with, no matter how secure, attractive or sexually adventurous you are, at a certain point in all relationships even if it is just sex there is a need to share. That urge that makes you want to share what happened during your day, and for somebody to just say ‘there, there’. Or when you are out, and you see your lover and while you are trying to say hello, they smile dismissively and walk away, and your stomach drops, you think to yourself, why did that happen, you are in trouble.

A JS relationship is about distance, rules and making sure that the moment there are any potential emotional entanglements, you remove yourself from the situation.

So here are a few rules of surviving a JS relationship and living to tell the tale.

• Distance – Distance is not necessarily keeping yourself at a distance (though that does also work) it’s about creating a distance in your mind that is clearly marked, this zone is only for sex. You have to be able to remove any form of emotional connection to the act of sex and mean it.

• Don’t call when you are on the rebound – Do not call a booty call within the first 2 weeks of a relationship break, there are too many emotions swirling around. Even if the relationship ended badly and you will never love the person again, the fact that you still have to deal with the fall out of that love makes you radioactive. Deal with your heart break before you call the booty call because whoever is coming is not coming to comfort you, they are coming to get laid and they don’t want to hear your emotional BS about how wonderful the relationship could have been, and if they are, then it’s not a booty call it’s a ‘relationship’.

• If you are in trouble don’t call – Ok if you are in trouble with the police or you are stranded somewhere call, but the truth is that and I’m sorry to say adversity brings out affection, particularly if you overcome that adversity with somebody who has seen you naked sexually. Everybody wants to lean on somebody at times of adversity and the emotional connections made means that you might start leaning on the person more and more at all times. Limit your exposure to just sex

• Get a JS partner who’s a bastard or a bitch – Yes I said it, get a useless not good arse, that on a good emotional day you would curse out and make them your go to. Afterall sociopaths have no mental limits (so the sexual world is your oyster) and also if the person is just for sex and its good sex but they are out of bounds behaviour wise in other circumstances, you can separate your need for love, from your need to shag their brains out.

When all is said and done a JS relationship is like candy floss it’s really sweet, and pretty to look at, but melt so quickly and become very stick when the wrong heat is aimed at it.